Today I went to the gym for the first time in nine weeks. Even though I could only do a light workout, mentally I needed to make this happen.
As I was getting ready, I felt afraid.
Afraid of feeling out of place.
Afraid of making a mistake and overdoing it.
Afraid of being demotivated by doing a light workout, when I was used to the heavy lifting prior to my surgery.
Fears, even though I’ve been to my gym hundreds of times.
As I heard these fears run through my head, I continued to get myself ready. I talked to myself a little. I kept going through the motions, knowing that I was going no matter what.
It reminded me of when I got back into lifting weights about seven years ago. I was sitting on the couch one night and realized I’d grown soft, a bit flabby, and unfit. I knew I had to do something, and that was get back to lifting.
At first, going to the gym was a drag. I was pushing myself to do something that wasn’t altogether pleasant just yet. I had to leave whatever I was doing at home and drive to the gym. I had to push forward, even when others said “I didn’t need” to go to the gym.
“Yes I do,” I said. And I went until it felt so good I didn’t want to stop.
Walking into a gym is one of the scariest things a person can do. So is going to your first personal training session. Hell, it can feel scary to sign up for online personal training. Performance anxiety, anyone?
We all experience fear when we do something new. The question is, what do you do with it?
There has to be a first time.
When I was finished with this first gym workout since my bilateral mastectomy, it felt monumental. I’d gotten myself ready. I’d pushed through my fears. I’d driven to the gym. I’d gotten out of the car, feeling uncertain, and I’d walked straight in.
I probably did overdo it by the way.
When you go to the gym, try a new workout, start a program or diet plan, or do anything for the first time, take a moment to comprehend what you’ve just done. You’re brave, not fearless. There will always be fears, but push through anyway. There’s good stuff on the other side.
This article originally appeared on www.workoutnirvana.com.